Now Where did I put that EKG

Several days and many moods later...

I am now on nothing but Lithium. 900 mg 2 times a day. seems to be better, I am not as confused and foggy as I have been for the past week or so. I hope that this lasts, see I had to go see Dr. Spock earlier this week because of what drug "X" was doing to me. I had the shortest fuse that I have had in a long time. And there were several other undesirable effects.

So here I sit in my classroom avoiding my peers so I won't have to force myself to act a certain way so they don't see what is really going on in my head. I hate the fact that I do this, but I don't know that I would be successful in this profession if I was entirely honest about it. I am supposed to be at a luncheon today, but I have no desire to go, but at the same time I do have a desire not to go. So guess it is all about how you look at it. But then again if that was the solution to everything, why don't we all walk around with a mirror?

They say that the grass is always greener on the other side. Wouldn't it be ironic if I became this unstable bumbling fool because of my actions while I was growing up. Remember in high school, how it was "cool" to be different, and to see things from another perspective, especially if that perspective wasn't always reality based? My guidance counselor thought I might be schizophrenic, yes I know, that is why she worked at a high school!!!! but I think that her saying that may have resulted in a manifestation of psychological symptoms of what I thought schizophrenia would be, and over the years, my brain became used to the ideas and processes that I had.

I guess there is a reason that I turned out to be this way, and maybe that's why I feel such a desire to get better for my family's sake.

And I still haven't posted about my iPhone. WTF?!
"Welcome to Wal*Mart, get yer shit and get out!!!"